A lot of people have a lot of hate for Blaine’s bowties and cropped trousers and colours. Some people hate them because they don’t like the style or the aesthetic. Other people don’t like them because they feel he’s copying (or trying to impress) Kurt — and there are all kinds of reasons why he might do that, and I think that’s possibly right. I’m happy to set that aside though, because I think copying Kurt might have a deeper reason for Blaine than just trying to be perfect for his boyfriend.
This morning, I woke to Racheline Maltese’s post on National Coming Out Day (which, incidentally, we don’t have in Ireland) and while I was writing the long comment to end all long comments, I decided to move it over here. She writes:
Additionally, coming out is complicated. For a lot of us, it involves not a sentence, but paragraphs, about sexual preference, romantic attraction, personal history and gender presentation and identity; and if we pass for whatever reason(s) (which is this whole mess of a thing filled with advantages and disadvantages and all sorts of complicated stuff), it can feel even harder to speak up.
It’s the passing comment that gets me every single time. Blaine passes. People don’t automatically assume he’s gay the way they do with Kurt. Some of you may think that’s a good thing. But from my perspective, it makes me feel really, really sad for Blaine, because I think it’s possible he doesn’t want to.
I passed quite effortlessly for the majority of my out life. It’s really only recently with the haircut and finally understanding why I was always shopping in the men’s section that I’m finding I don’t. And I wouldn’t go back to passing as straight for anything. It was — at best — uncomfortable and — at worst — isolating.
It’s like the bisexual woman who is dating a man — she no less bisexual — but she can feel isolated because she’s invisible not only to the straight world, but to her own community. I remember being assumed straight at Pride meetings, facing down religious protesters outside the council chambers, meeting Peter Tatchell and Angela Mason, hitting on a girl I fancied. See where this gets way awkward?
And there were reasons I didn’t try harder to not pass. I felt the way I was dressing was attractive and helpful. I enjoyed the attention I did get as a feminine looking (but oh man, not acting, wow that must have been weird) lesbian when I was among friends. I wore short skirt suits with stockings and high heels and push-up bras and makeup. It was for work, the look, because I didn’t know another way to dress (we’ll talk about my mom later) professionally and it worked in that respect, but it was always, always an act.
Now, I’ll make this 200% clear: many people pass because they genuinely are in touch with their gender identity and it is typical enough for them to pass. That’s just not my story. It may not be Blaine’s either.
I see Blaine as someone who finally has a reason to break out. He — as a guy in a relationship with another guy — now doesn’t pass so he gets to play now. There’s no fooling anyone who knows, and the whole of McKinley undoubtedly knows they’re a couple, so he can let go. He can fool around a bit with how he presents himself. He can not-pass, and I think to Blaine, who wore his Dalton blues so well, this is pretty liberating.
Honestly, in two years, that boy’s gonna be shirtless in a pick up truck at Pride (with glitter). I just know it.